They Don’t Have to Like You: Why Relatable Content Beats Approval

They don’t have to like you.

I know that sounds like terrible social media advice at first. It sounds backwards, especially when so much of social media is built around being liked. We post something, we watch for likes, hearts, comments, shares, reactions, and follows. We get that little dopamine hit when people respond positively. We feel like the content worked because people approved of it.

And to be clear, I’m not saying it’s bad if people like you. I’m not saying you should try to be unlikable, negative, abrasive, or obnoxious. That is not the point.

The point is that being liked is not the same thing as being remembered. It is not the same thing as being trusted. It is not the same thing as being relevant. And it is definitely not the same thing as being hired.

For a business, the real goal of content is not just to get applause. It is to create recognition.

When the right person sees your content, the reaction you want is not always, “That was nice.” Sometimes the reaction you want is, “That’s me.”

That is much more powerful.

Someone can like your funny video and still have no idea what you do. They can like your vacation photo and never become a customer. They can like your dog, your lunch, your inspirational quote, your behind-the-scenes picture, your clever joke, or your trending audio, and still never connect your business with a real problem they need solved.

But when someone sees a piece of content and thinks, “I’m dealing with that right now,” you have done something different. You have moved from entertainment into relevance. You have shown that you understand their world.

That is where trust starts.

Social media has trained businesses to chase the wrong signal. It tells us that visible approval equals success. If the post gets a lot of likes, it must be good. If it gets comments, it must be working. If people say nice things, the strategy must be effective.

Maybe.

But maybe not.

A post can be popular without being useful. A post can be charming without being strategic. A post can be pleasant without moving anyone closer to working with you.

And on the other side, a post can be incredibly effective even if it does not get a huge number of likes.

That is the uncomfortable truth for businesses: the content that quietly makes someone feel understood may matter more than the content that gets a crowd to clap.

I think this is one of the biggest mistakes businesses make online. They confuse likability with connection.

Likability says, “People enjoy this.”

Connection says, “The right person recognizes themselves in this.”

Those are not the same thing.

Think about how people actually make buying decisions. Most of the time, they are not scrolling social media thinking, “Which business do I like the most?” They are thinking about themselves. Their problem. Their frustration. Their goal. Their fear. Their delay. Their uncertainty. Their bad past experience. Their hope that someone can make this easier.

People are always filtering content through the question, “Is this for me?”

That does not mean they consciously say that every time. But that is what is happening. They are deciding whether your message applies to their life, their business, their situation, their pain point, their timing.

If your content is only trying to be liked, it often stays too broad. Too polished. Too general. Too safe.

You say things like:

“We’re passionate about helping our clients succeed.”

“We provide high-quality service.”

“We believe in excellence.”

“We love what we do.”

“We’re here for all your needs.”

Those statements are fine. They are positive. They are likable enough. Nobody is going to be offended by them.

But that is part of the problem.

Nobody is offended. Nobody is challenged. Nobody is seen. Nobody thinks, “Wow, that is exactly what I am dealing with.”

The content is pleasant, but it is invisible.

Relatable content is different. Relatable content gets specific enough that the right person feels recognized.

For example, there is a big difference between saying:

“We can help you with your marketing.”

And saying:

“You keep putting off your marketing until business slows down, and then you try to fix six months of inconsistency in two weeks.”

That second one may not get as many cheerful likes. It may even sting a little. But if someone is doing exactly that, they know you are talking to them.

And that is the point.

Or compare:

“We build professional websites.”

With:

“If your website still looks like the business you were five years ago, it may be quietly costing you the customers you are trying to attract today.”

That is not just a service description. That is a mirror.

The right person reads that and thinks, “I have been meaning to deal with that.”

That is recognition.

Recognition is powerful because it makes people feel understood before they ever contact you. It shows them that you are not just selling a service in a generic way. You understand the situation they are in. You understand the mental roadblocks. You understand the decisions they are delaying. You understand the mistakes they are trying not to repeat.

That is usually much more persuasive than simply being pleasant.

A lot of businesses are afraid to create this kind of content because it feels too direct. They do not want to sound negative. They do not want to call anyone out. They do not want to make people uncomfortable. They want everyone to feel good when they read the post.

I understand that instinct. But if you are trying to make everyone feel good, you may end up saying nothing that matters.

Good business content is not always about making people feel comfortable. Sometimes it helps people identify a problem they have been avoiding. Sometimes it puts words to a frustration they have not been able to explain. Sometimes it tells them the truth they already know but have not wanted to deal with.

That does not mean you have to be harsh. There is a big difference between being direct and being insulting.

You can say, “You may have outgrown the website you started with,” without saying, “Your website is terrible.”

You can say, “The cheapest option often becomes expensive when you have to redo the work,” without saying, “You made a stupid decision.”

You can say, “If you only think about marketing when business slows down, you are always going to be reacting instead of building momentum,” without shaming anyone.

Relatable content should not make your audience feel attacked. It should make them feel seen.

That difference matters.

The goal is not to embarrass the customer. The goal is to name the reality they are already living in.

When people feel seen, they listen differently.

If you have ever had someone explain your problem better than you could explain it yourself, you know what I mean. There is an immediate sense of trust. You think, “Okay, this person gets it.” And if they understand the problem that clearly, you are more likely to believe they can help solve it.

That is why relatability often beats likability.

Likability can be surface-level. Relatability goes deeper.

A person might like a post because it is clever. They might relate to a post because it names something true about their life or business.

And from a marketing standpoint, those two responses are very different.

Let’s say a business owner posts a funny meme about coffee on a Monday morning. It gets a bunch of likes. People laugh. They comment. It feels successful.

But what did it actually do for the business?

Maybe it showed personality. That has some value. Maybe it kept the page active. That has some value too. I am not against personality posts.

But if most of the content is built around being likable, funny, agreeable, or broadly appealing, the audience may enjoy the business without ever understanding why they should hire it.

Now imagine another post from that same business:

“You know your website needs work, but every time you think about fixing it, it turns into a bigger project in your head. So you leave it alone, even though you know it is not representing your business the way it should.”

That post might not get as many public reactions. People may not rush to like it because it feels a little personal. But the person who needs it may stop scrolling. They may save it. They may click. They may think about it later. They may finally reach out.

That is the kind of response that does not always show up in vanity metrics.

This is why I think businesses need to be careful about judging content only by what is visible.

Likes are visible. Recognition is often invisible.

A like is public. A moment of self-recognition is private.

Someone may not want to comment, “Yes, I have been neglecting my marketing and now I am panicking.” They may not want to publicly admit, “I hired the cheap option and now I am paying twice.” They may not click the heart button on a post that basically describes their mistake.

But that does not mean the post failed.

In fact, that may be the post that matters most.

The content that makes someone feel exposed, understood, or honestly reflected may not be the content they publicly applaud. But it may be the content that moves them.

This is especially true for service businesses, consultants, creatives, contractors, professionals, and local businesses. If you sell something that requires trust, people need more than awareness. They need confidence that you understand the situation they are in.

Generic positivity does not build that kind of confidence.

Specific insight does.

To create more relatable content, you have to stop writing for “everybody” and start writing for the right person.

That sounds obvious, but it is hard in practice. The moment we post publicly, we often start watering things down. We think about the friend from high school who might see it. The past client. The random follower. The peer in our industry. The person who might misunderstand us. The person who might not need what we offer.

So we make the message safer.

We make it more general.

We remove the edge.

We turn a real observation into a vague statement.

But the more you try to make content acceptable to everyone, the less likely it is to deeply connect with someone.

The right customer does not need you to be universally appealing. They need you to be relevant to them.

That means some people will not care. Good. They are not the target for that message.

Some people will not relate. Fine. They may not have that problem.

Some people may scroll past. That is normal.

But the person who does relate may feel like you are speaking directly to them.

That is the goal.

The question I like to ask before posting is simple:

Will the right person see themselves in this?

Not, “Will everyone like this?”

Not, “Will this get applause?”

Not, “Is this impressive?”

Not, “Does this make me look polished?”

Will the right person see themselves in this?

That question changes the way you create content.

If the answer is no, the post may be too vague.

If the answer is no, the post may be more about you than your customer.

If the answer is no, the post may be chasing approval instead of building connection.

Let’s look at the difference.

A post that says, “We offer great customer service,” is about you.

A post that says, “If you are tired of chasing down contractors who do not call you back, we built our process around communication from start to finish,” is about the customer.

A post that says, “We make beautiful websites,” is about you.

A post that says, “If people keep asking questions your website should already answer, your site may not be doing its job,” is about the customer.

A post that says, “We care about quality,” is about you.

A post that says, “If you have ever paid for the cheaper option and then had to hire someone else to fix it, you already know why quality matters,” is about the customer.

The second version in each example is more relatable because it starts with the customer’s lived experience. It gives them something to recognize.

And once they recognize themselves, they are more likely to care about your solution.

That is another place businesses get it backwards. They start with the solution too soon.

They want to talk about the service, the package, the features, the credentials, the process, the offer. But customers usually connect first through the problem.

They need to feel, “This person understands what I am dealing with.”

Then they become open to, “Maybe this person can help.”

If you skip the recognition step and go straight to selling, your content often feels like an interruption. But if you start by naming the problem clearly, your content feels relevant.

This is not manipulation. It is clarity.

You are not inventing pain points. You are paying attention to the real ones.

Every business has these patterns if you listen for them.

What do customers complain about before they hire you?

What mistakes do they commonly make?

What do they misunderstand about your industry?

What do they delay too long?

What have they tried before that did not work?

What are they embarrassed to admit?

What are they afraid will happen?

What are they secretly hoping is possible?

What do they say on the first phone call?

What do they say after the project is done?

Those answers are content.

Not in a gimmicky way. In a real way.

Your customers are constantly telling you what future customers need to hear. The phrases they use, the frustrations they repeat, the objections they bring up, the bad experiences they describe — those are windows into what relatable content should look like.

If someone says, “I know I should have done this sooner,” that is a post.

If someone says, “I just did not know where to start,” that is a post.

If someone says, “I thought I could handle it myself, but it became too much,” that is a post.

If someone says, “I was worried this would be more complicated than it was,” that is a post.

If someone says, “I wish I had called you before I wasted money on the first version,” that is definitely a post.

Those statements are powerful because they are not abstract. They are real.

And the next person who feels the same way will recognize them.

That is how you build connection.

A lot of businesses think content has to be impressive. They want to sound like the best. They want to list achievements. They want to appear successful, professional, smooth, and polished.

There is a place for credibility. People do want to know you can do the job.

But credibility without relatability can feel distant.

If your content only says, “Look how great we are,” the customer still has to do the work of figuring out whether you are right for them.

Relatable content closes that gap.

It says, “Here is what you are experiencing. Here is why it happens. Here is what people often get wrong. Here is what to think about. Here is how to move forward.”

That kind of content naturally positions you as someone who understands.

And people often buy from the person who understands them best.

Not always the person with the slickest content.

Not always the person with the most likes.

Not always the person who seems the most popular.

The person who understands them best.

That is why the “they don’t have to like you” idea matters so much.

If you make likability the goal, you may avoid saying the very thing your ideal customer needs to hear.

You may avoid being specific because specificity excludes people.

You may avoid being direct because directness can make people uncomfortable.

You may avoid naming mistakes because you do not want to sound judgmental.

You may avoid taking a point of view because someone may disagree.

But content without a point of view is easy to forget.

The goal is not to be controversial for the sake of being controversial. I do not think every business needs to pick fights online or manufacture bold opinions just to get attention. That gets old quickly.

But you should be willing to say something true.

You should be willing to say, “This is the pattern I see.”

You should be willing to say, “This is why that approach often fails.”

You should be willing to say, “Here is the cost of waiting too long.”

You should be willing to say, “Here is what people misunderstand before they hire someone.”

You should be willing to say, “Here is the thing you may not want to hear, but probably need to consider.”

That is where useful content lives.

And yes, sometimes that kind of content may not be as universally likable.

Someone who is not ready to hear it may scroll past.

Someone who feels called out may not click like.

Someone who wants only light, fun posts may not engage.

That is okay.

You are not creating content to be everyone’s favorite account. You are creating content to reach the right people in the right way.

This also changes how you evaluate your own content emotionally.

If you are constantly looking for approval, social media becomes exhausting. Every post becomes a little test of your value. Did people like it? Did they comment? Did this perform? Did I get enough validation?

That is a rough way to run a marketing strategy.

But if your goal is recognition, you can be more grounded. You can ask better questions.

Did this speak to a real customer problem?

Did this make the right person feel seen?

Did this explain something clearly?

Did this address an objection?

Did this name a common frustration?

Did this help someone understand what to do next?

Those are better questions for business content.

They are not always as instantly gratifying as watching likes roll in. But they are more useful.

Now, this does not mean metrics do not matter at all. Of course they matter. Reach matters. Engagement can matter. Comments can tell you what people are responding to. Shares can show that a message landed. Saves can be a good sign that something was useful.

But the metrics should not be the only measure of whether the content is doing its job.

A post with ten likes from the right people may be more valuable than a post with two hundred likes from people who will never buy from you, refer you, remember you, or understand what you do.

The quality of the connection matters.

This is why audience clarity is so important.

If you do not know who you are trying to reach, you will default to trying to please everybody. And when you try to please everybody, content gets bland.

The sharper your understanding of the right person, the sharper your content can be.

Who are they?

What problem are they aware of?

What problem are they not yet aware of?

What do they think they need?

What do they actually need?

What are they tired of?

What have they tried?

What are they skeptical about?

What would make them trust you?

What would make them delay?

What would make them finally act?

Once you know that, you can create content that feels like a conversation instead of a broadcast.

You stop posting random filler and start making people feel understood.

For example, instead of another generic “contact us today” post, you might say:

“If you keep telling yourself you will update your website when things slow down, just remember that slow seasons are usually when you need your website working the hardest.”

That is specific. It speaks to a real pattern. It may make the right person pause.

Instead of saying:

“Marketing is important for every business.”

You might say:

“If referrals are your entire marketing plan, you may not notice the problem until they slow down. By then, you are trying to create demand under pressure.”

That is relatable for a business that has coasted on referrals and suddenly realizes it has no consistent marketing system.

Instead of saying:

“We offer affordable solutions.”

You might say:

“Saving money upfront does not help much if the finished product does not solve the problem you hired someone to fix.”

That speaks to someone who has been burned by choosing only on price.

These posts may not be the most cheerful. They may not be cute. They may not get the same casual likes as a funny photo.

But they are relevant.

And relevance is what makes someone pay attention.

The best content often creates a moment of tension. Not drama, but tension.

It brings together where the customer is and where they want to be. It highlights the gap. It helps them see the cost of staying where they are. It gives language to the thing they have been feeling.

That tension is useful.

Without it, content becomes decoration.

And a lot of business content online is basically decoration. It fills the feed. It keeps the account active. It looks fine. It sounds nice. But it does not really do anything.

It does not make a point.

It does not move a thought forward.

It does not help the audience see themselves.

It does not create urgency.

It does not build trust.

It just exists.

I would rather see a business post less often with more relevance than post constantly with content nobody remembers.

That is another trap social media creates. It makes us think volume is the answer. Post every day. Be everywhere. Keep feeding the machine.

Consistency matters, but consistency without clarity is just noise.

If every post is trying to be likable, pleasant, or active, you may technically be showing up, but you are not necessarily becoming more meaningful to the people you want to reach.

Before you worry about posting more, worry about whether the posts are saying something your customer recognizes.

That is where the question comes back:

Will the right person see themselves in this?

If the answer is yes, the content has a much better chance of building real connection.

If the answer is no, improve it before posting.

One way to do that is to replace general claims with specific situations.

General claim:

“We help businesses grow.”

Specific situation:

“You have reached the point where word-of-mouth alone is not enough, but you do not have a clear plan for where the next customers are coming from.”

General claim:

“We make the process easy.”

Specific situation:

“You do not want another project that turns into twenty confusing emails, missed deadlines, and decisions you do not feel qualified to make.”

General claim:

“We care about getting results.”

Specific situation:

“You do not need a website that just looks nice. You need one that answers the questions people ask before they are ready to contact you.”

The specific version draws the right person in because it reflects their reality.

Another way is to address the hidden emotion behind the problem.

People rarely buy because of the surface-level issue alone. There is usually emotion underneath it.

They are frustrated.

They are overwhelmed.

They are embarrassed.

They are skeptical.

They are tired of wasting time.

They are afraid of making the wrong decision.

They are annoyed that something they paid for did not work.

They are worried they are falling behind.

They are hoping the fix is simpler than they imagine.

When your content speaks to that emotional layer, it becomes more relatable.

For example:

“You are not avoiding your website because you do not care. You are avoiding it because every time you think about it, it feels like a project you do not have time to manage.”

That feels different from:

“Update your website today.”

One is a command. The other shows understanding.

And understanding is what lowers resistance.

People do not want to feel sold to before they feel understood.

This is why educational content works so well when it is rooted in the customer’s experience. You are not just teaching facts. You are helping people make sense of a situation they are already in.

You can explain why cheap work often costs more in the long run.

You can explain why waiting until business slows down makes marketing harder.

You can explain why a beautiful website that does not answer customer questions may still fail.

You can explain why inconsistency on social media makes it harder for people to remember what you do.

You can explain why “I just need something simple” can sometimes mean “I have not yet thought through what this actually needs to accomplish.”

Those insights are valuable because they help the customer think more clearly.

And when your content helps people think more clearly, they begin to trust you.

Not because you begged for the sale.

Not because you posted the most polished graphic.

Not because everyone liked it.

Because you understood the problem.

That is the shift I want more businesses to make.

Stop asking only, “How do I get more people to like this?”

Start asking, “How do I make the right person feel understood?”

Stop chasing the easiest reaction.

Start creating the most meaningful recognition.

Stop making content that is merely pleasant.

Start making content that is useful, specific, honest, and relevant.

Again, none of this means you should remove personality from your content. Personality matters. People do want to get a feel for who they are hiring. It is okay to be warm, funny, personal, casual, or entertaining.

But personality should support the message, not replace it.

If people like your personality and also understand how you can help them, great.

If people enjoy your content and see themselves in it, even better.

The problem is when likability becomes the whole strategy.

A business cannot survive on being generally liked by people who do not know what it does, do not remember why it matters, and do not feel any urgency to act.

The content has to connect back to the customer’s world.

That is why the question is so useful. It cuts through a lot of noise.

Before you post, ask:

Will the right person see themselves in this?

If you are posting a client story, will the right person recognize a similar situation?

If you are posting a tip, will the right person understand why it applies to them?

If you are posting a mistake to avoid, will the right person think, “I might be doing that”?

If you are posting an opinion, will the right person see that you understand their frustration?

If you are posting about your service, will the right person understand what problem it solves in their life or business?

That one question can keep your content from drifting into empty approval-seeking.

Because the truth is, people do not necessarily buy from the person they like the most.

They often buy from the person who understands them best.

And being understood is deeper than being liked.

A like is quick. Recognition lingers.

A like says, “That was nice.”

Recognition says, “That was about me.”

A like may be forgotten in seconds.

Recognition may be the reason someone remembers you when they are finally ready to act.

So yes, it is fine if people like your content. It is fine if they like you. I am not against that.

But do not make that the highest goal.

The next time you create a post, do not just polish it until it is agreeable. Do not just soften it until nobody could possibly object. Do not just make it motivational, cute, clever, or broadly appealing because that feels safer.

Make it specific enough to matter.

Make it honest enough to be useful.

Make it clear enough that the right person can recognize themselves in it.

Because they do not have to like every post.

They need to know you get it.